Episode 66: Diner Dash
by kay jolyn
Summary: Robin's DNA Buddy, Larry, appears in Jump City once more, asking the Titans to help his home world fight off some unnamed evil. What sort of wacky, otherworldly adventures are they in for? Hints of RobStar and BBRae in later chapters. DISCONTINUED.


Hi! This is a story that just popped into my brain while I was in the middle of writing Chapter 11 of **Strangers in the Night**. It was supposed to just be a oneshot about the Titans eating at a diner, but my muse just _unraveled_ an entire storyline out for me, so this will hopefully be a multi-chaptered fic about even more Titans adventures with Robin's DNA Buddy, Larry! I'm not sure how many chapters it's going to be…I suppose it depends on if people like it or not. It's definitely silly, and I wish I was better at writing humor, but here it is anyway. Don't take it too seriously. ;)

**WARNINGS** - Not beta-read. Barely edited. Late-night, caffeine-induced silliness.

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**Episode 66: Diner Dash - Chapter 1**

At the early hour of eight o'clock one bright morning, Titans Tower found itself in its typically chaotic disarray...

"Joyous morning, Friends!" cried Starfire too-happily as she entered the common room, levitating several feet off the floor. Her greeting went largely unnoticed, considering Beast Boy and Cyborg were occupied with their usual breakfast banter over the stove and Robin, who was uncharacteristically grumpy in the early morning, was yelling at them to "_shut up_, you idiots - you'll wake Star!" Meanwhile, a tic had developed in Raven's forehead, and her concentration had so forsaken her that she failed to realize that she was holding her latest murder mystery upside down.

"Dude, scrambled tofu and soymilk does _not sound girly!_"

"It does too!" Cyborg countered. "T-Bone steak and eggs...Mmm, now _that's_ a man's breakfast!"

"Perhaps I may interest you in a plate of my special homemade glorg?" Starfire interrupted hopefully, not noticing Robin's instant blush and stuttered "morning, Star."

"Starfire, _no one_ wants a plate of your nasty homemade glorg," Beast Boy said irritably, turning to her as she recoiled.

"Hey! Don't talk to her like that!" Robin barked.

"Why, Robin, huh? Do _you _want some of your girlfriend's glorg?" Cyborg taunted.

Robin furiously floundered for words as Beast Boy dissolved into helpless giggles. Before the Boy Wonder could retort, however, Raven slammed down her book with a scream, encased the stove in black, and instantaneously combusted it.

--

"Please, Friends," Starfire said beseechingly from the back of the T-car, "what is a..._diner_?"

"Well, Star," Robin began, always happy to oblige her. He was slightly--but not uncomfortably--squeezed in the backseat between Starfire and Raven; he would have taken the R-cycle had he not expressed terrifying, early morning road rage at some previous occasion. Not a morning person, that Robin. "A diner is a kind of restaurant...like the pizzeria, except they mostly serve breakfast stuff. The food is usually pretty cheap, too."

"These..._diners_ solely serve food items to break one's fast?"

"Not really. They have other stuff too. Diners are just known for serving breakfast all day long."

"All-day breakfast extravaganza!" Cyborg and Beast Boy cheered in unison, united and amiable for the moment.

Starfire squealed excitedly. "I will order one stack of waffles with plenty of mustard on top!"

Everyone took a silent moment to sweatdrop. Except for Cyborg; he grinned extra-brightly from the driver's seat. "Waffles!" he exclaimed happily.

"Uhm, Star? Waffles usually come topped with _ice cream_," Raven stated emotionlessly.

"How delightful!" Starfire said cheerfully, not missing a beat. "One stack of waffles with mustard _and _mint ice cream on top!"

--

"Really, Rae, this was the best idea you've ever had," Beast Boy said through a mouthful of tofu eggs.

Raven cringed as she was sprayed with yellow bits of Beast Boy's omelet. "Better than watching you guys fight over what to have for breakfast," she trailed off as she watched the Titans savagely inhale their respective meals. "…I think. Ugh. You're all pigs."

"Nope, just BB," Cyborg said wittily, his cheek bulging. He stuck a thumb in Beast Boy's direction, who obediently transformed into an enormous, spotted green pig.

"...Gross."

"Beast Boy, no animals at the table," Robin managed, even though his mouth was full.

"Delicious!" Starfire exclaimed as she wolfed down her waffles à la mustard. "I wish we…_huh_?"

Her pile of waffles seemed to expand outwardly to impossibly gigantic proportions before exploding, coating the Titans with mustard sauce, mint ice cream, and bits of fluffy waffle. And from the explosion, appeared…

"_LARRY?!" _

"Yay! I made it!" Larry cried happily from midair, shaking the mustard from his body like a dog. "Hello, Titans! Hi! How are ya? Hey! _Hi, DNA Buddy!_" he said, shaking each of their hands vigorously. "Why, hello _mademoiselle!_" he took Starfire's hand and kissed it sensually, his voice taking on a grating French accent.

Starfire recovered from the shock first, and managed to giggle cutely. She plucked Larry from the air and hugged him tight. "Welcome back, sweet, adorable doppelganger Larry!" she cooed as he turned into a pile of mush and slid from her grasp with a sigh. "Hee hee."

Suddenly remembering, Beast Boy clapped both hands to his mouth and mumbled through his fingers, "You're not taking my mouth this time!"

"You know, I actually wish he would," Raven deadpanned.

"Uh, Larry? What are you doing here?" Robin asked as Larry put his stubby arms around Robin's neck in a miniature hug.

Larry stopped his constant giggling and actually looked sober for a moment. "We're in trouble! Trouble!" That moment ended (rather too quickly, in the Titans' opinion) when Larry began bouncing all over the diner; off tables, chairs, waitresses, peoples' heads… "Trouble! Titans, trouble! When--there's--trou--ble--you--know--who--to--call…"

Robin's hand shot out and caught his "DNA Buddy" in mid-bounce. He clapped a gloved hand over Larry's mouth to still his singing, and said firmly, "Larry, _who's_ in trouble?"

"We are!" he squeaked. "We are! We are! We're in trouble trouble trouble--"

"_Raven,_" Cyborg said cautiously as the Empath beside him started steaming from the ears. "Calm down, little lady…"

"Make. Him. Stop."

Sensing the potential danger, Robin shook Larry a little and said, even more firmly, "_Who _is?"

"Everyone from Dimension 498!" Larry announced, pouting a little. He let Robin set him down on the table and sat forlornly in the butter. "Some big and mean and evil and dark and mean things came from an evil dark dimension and took over _our_ dimension - Dimension 498 that is, not this one - and enslaved everyone in Jump City like the Titans and all the people and the animals and everyone and everything and I got away 'cos I'm lucky and then I came here to get you and now here I am--"

Raven interrupted his continuous speech by wrapping a black gag around his mouth. "…What evil thing?" The tone in her voice was dangerous.

"Not your dad, nope, no," Larry said, almost as if he read her mind. Raven's sigh of relief was almost imperceptible.

"Then who has done such a terrible thing?" Starfire asked, clasping her hands together in distress.

Larry shuddered. "Can't say. Too scary! Too scary!" And with that he leapt into the Tameranian's arms.

"Poor Larry," she burbled sympathetically as she stroked his head.

"Fine, we'll help you," Robin decided, his mask arching at the scene.

Larry somersaulted into the air with a cry of joy. "Hooray! Titans to the rescue!"

"But how do we reach Dimension 498?" Cyborg said. "I guess I can build a Time-and-Space machine…"

"No need!" Larry said cheerfully. "I've got…MY MAGIC FINGER!"

"Oh, no."

"Don't worry, Robin!" Larry said, waving his glowing pointer finger. "I've been practicing!"

"…Oh, _no_."

"Ready?" the doppelganger cried enthusiastically, the glow in his finger growing steadily in size until he and the Titans were completely enveloped in a half-sphere of bright, white light.

"Wait! _Wait, Larry--_!"

Then, darkness.

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Ha HA! Cliffhanger!  
…Wow. I really do end everything with a cliffhanger, don't I? Eep, sorry... 

I love the episode **Fractured** (the episode where we were first introduced to little Larry). I thought it was such a fun, silly, seemingly pointless episode…like **Mad Mod **or **Episode 257-494**. I think they were meant to be used as inspiration for fanfics, heehee.

And diners! I love eating at diners. I'm a breakfast food kind of girl, no matter what time of the day.

Comments and constructive criticism are, as always, very welcome. Love you all!


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